Supplementary rations

This incident also took place at Putlos and has given me a chuckle each time I recall it! The garages for our trucks were near one of the camp gates. Beside this gate was a house, the back garden of which was accessible from the camp. I was with my truck one morning when I heard the sound of running feet. John Jordan, another driver, came running up to me and said “Hilder’s been caught by a German when he went to pinch eggs from his chicken house!” Next came Mervyn, very out of breath and red in the face. “Where can I hide? Some old German’s chasing me!” he panted. I motioned him up into the back of my truck and covered him with a camouflage net. The next to come round the corner was the German gentleman, looking very angry and determined to seek out the miscreant. He looked around the garages and the trucks, but realising he was on a good hiding to nothing, mooched off.

It transpired that John and Merv had gone to pinch eggs from the chicken coop, which was in the garden of the aforementioned house. John stayed outside to keep watch while Mervyn went to do the dirty deed. On opening the door to the coop he was confronted by the owner, sitting inside, waiting for whoever was stealing his eggs! According to Mervyn’s account as told to me later, the man jumped up and grabbed him, shouting, “You steal my eggs. You come M.P! You come M.P!” Merv then pushed him off, with the edifying rejoinder “You go fuck off!” and took to his heels!

This man was a member of the German Service Organisation, employed by the British Army for various duties, including security. A few nights after this incident, Mervyn found himself on guard duty and spent a large part of the night in the same guardroom as the chicken keeper. Nothing was said and it was a very chastened Mervyn who came off duty in the morning!

There is an amusing footnote to this story. Whilst researching on the internet, I put in a search for ‘Mervyn Hilder’, with no great expectation of success. Immediately there came up a photograph of the man in question, on the website of the ‘Ashdown Forest Poultry Club’! Yes, that’s right, Merv is a chicken and egg fancier! But then, he always was!